I’m Single, Not Sick…

This goes out to single friends following dreams, feeding adventurous souls until it is out of our system. “Once you meet Mr. Right, you will want kids,” put your hands up if you have heard that a zillion times. This biological clock is not ticking, I’m not sure it has a battery. I look at kids longer than comfortable to test if the internal cuckoo will chime. Usually facial expressions form as I inquisitively peer at the tiny gremlins surrounded by paraphernalia. I start hyperventilating, sweating, envisioning the quintessential country vehicle, the car seats, Gap sweaters and fuzzy blankies. Dogs slobber on car windows as if trying to escape the madness toward freedom entering the park full of ergonomic strollers that swivel. Infants learn to text, as moms surround in yoga pants. No intention to offend those readers choosing this lifestyle, it is just as far from my DNA as diapers are to a slalom course.

It would be nice if a hottie could keep me snuggly when sick, or to hug during storms. However, I don’t want kids and although I respect marriage, am leery of it. I have tried various slippers. Cinderella dear, you had it easy.

When friends have me meet a “perfect guy” usually the encounter leaves me preferring to stick a fork in my eye. It’s funny who others feel right for you. My gram wanted me to date a local professional whom she didn’t know was homosexual. My brother thinks I’m a lesbian, my mom thinks I’ll never marry, my dad has said “at least he’s not a hammerhead.” My aunt has a sailor in mind who’s probably out at sea, my sister says I don’t need a man. Each social gathering someone is trying to pick the perfect male specimen for me to spend the rest of my life with, like it’s a lottery ticket at a truck stop. Friends, can we have fun and not focus on status? Life is not Facebook! Do I look like an alien? The 8th wonder?! Perhaps I live selfishly, I play a lot but feel at peace following my internal voice. This guide has kept me sane trumping societies concept of what is best for me. I don’t want to discredit the value of a committed marriage, quite the opposite I highly respect it. Unsure if I could accomplish it because the only part I envision of my wedding is the horse and carriage…probably not the most important aspect.

When you see a “single” girl mingling in the community, please don’t look at her like she’s a zoo animal. Perhaps she is doing some valuable self discovery before meeting Prince Charming. If you are a gentlemen who isn’t afraid to dance or belly laugh, who likes to travel or ski and can share heart to heart conversation until wee hours, perhaps I will be present on a second date. Until then this Bean is flyin’ solo prior to sharing it with a co-pilot.

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